Wednesday, May. 21, 2008 - 5:21 p.m.
Accident Report
*****************
Taser is the cutest kitten
and he has a sweet nature
but he is pretty rough
in the claws and teeth dept.
Looking down I can see
a hundred puncture marks
on my hands and wrists
and a few longer gashes
on my forearms
-all Taser inflicted wounds
It was warm the other day
so I put on shorts
and was sitting here
answering mail
- soft white winter leg skin
exposed to the whirling claws
of an 11 week old kitten
and sure enough
he humps onto my lap
completely announced
and not finding the coarse cloth
' of my regular jeans
somthing to anchor his claws into
he slipped and sunk his claws
deep into my skin and fell anyway
dragging his kitten needles sideways
across my thigh
in five deep grooves
ya, this bled like a Mofo
as I sopped it up with kleenex
and I was ashamed to confess
that I was betterd in combat
by a squirrel sized red haired kitten
so I just put on jeans
to thwart further damage
wearing kitten armour
around the house
as if I was on a
peacekeeping mission in Iraq
and still hre I was,
receiving collateral damage
So Day two I am almost crippled here
my leg is so sore it hurts to walk
I can't believe I have been
rendered partially immobile
from a manic kitten attack
I can feel the ripps in my skin
throbbing under my jeans
I have to either get him to wear mittens
or get better kitten proof armour
maybe it will better
by the 12th week
maybe i can clot faster
maybe Taser will catch more mice
unless they have all
moved outside by now
and I am her alone with
--the Kitten of Doom
On the saner side
I dreampt that I watched Taser
jump into the bathtub full of water
and walk along the bottom, fearless
his fur swaying like seaweed
maybe I am worried
he will jump into the tub
while I am in the tub
like Jinky would do sometimes
and get completely soaked
and i would dry him off and
set him up over the warm air register
to dry off as he shivvered
Jinky never learned
to stop jumping in the bathtub
but I learned to
close ther bathroom door
