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Tuesday, Oct. 24, 2017 - 9:52 p.m.

I'm Just Fine
************
I don;t write here very much anymore
and I don;t read a lot of diaries anymore.
Gone are the interesting crazy people
and their transparent lives
Instread, it's old ladies
grumbling about their jobs
spouses and Trump
the occasional romance
but mostly lowliness and purposeless existence

hardly worth apple;aiding for any of that
unless leaden doubt normalcy is the new cool
which I doubt
then I guess I wish everybody struggling
good luck and then try to get away
back to my happy little life
and get back to my habits of making little happy

I guess my only
heart wrenching drama concerns
are for for cats
and they;re fine

The real crazy people
who used to walk t across
the white carpets my life
with muddy shoes are now
pretty much permanently installed
in the town bars

I am watching them age fast
and notice our conversations
are never more than hey or hi
more like a squeekie toy response
than a thought process

two three beers a night
....forever
that mops up their time
between dinner and bed
and out of trouble

And to think I used to wonder what the value of bars was?
Now I know
they provide a place to exist in
that , unlike a mental hospital
pays its own way as
a community service
Alcohol taxes dutifully collected
and the grain harvest
gets consumed in liquid form


Most of these people are married
yet they fade away to the bar
like clockwork
to hang out with divorced friends
and make eyes at the barmaids
who are closer to 40 than 20

I just worry about my cats
who don;t need me worrying about them
They are fine
I'm fine
we are fine

We are ready for winter
and thats that
Their fur has grown in luxuriously
and my sweater and sweatshirt collection
is ready to go

I should just stop paying attention to
the town drunks
but its hard when they are your neighbours
and they drive into the ditch at 2 am
' and they need a push
and they see my lights on
and knock on the door
I never refuse anyone
as long as they drive off afterwards

Cats watch it all through the window
with a mild curiosity
I never explain whats going on to them
they;re cats
they would;t care
even if I did explain

Its only October
' and the winter drunks
are ready early too

 

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