Monday, Sept. 21, 2009 - 5:24 p.m.
Tuna Hustler
***************
I was awoken at 5:30 am
by Taser crying starving
Starving?
Yesterday was tuna day
he gots to eat yresterday
& I checked his bowl
& it was full of kibble
before i went to bed.
Starving?
so i got up @ dawn
and saw there were
lots of kibble there still
so I topped it off
with the last bit of tuna
and went back to bed
Got up later and went to work
but left early
as it was raining
things were slow but when I got home
pal Ron was standing in the driveway
I made a joke
" hey stay for lunch
we're having Tuna"
he said " you're too late"
Too late?
too late for what?
Too late for tuna
Theres more
No there isn't
There isn't?? why not?
I already did it where were you?
Where was I? you did what already??
Taser walks out of his
cedar hedge cat hide out
just in time to see me
trying to figure out what was what
as taser looked on at us
tail swaying in the ligjt mist I learned Ron had stiopped by
and taser ran out screaming to him
with some sort of
"
I haven't been fed for days
you-know-who has been gone for days
and didn't leave me any food
can you help me out?"
So Ron went into my place
and opened up a can of Tuna
and fed a ravaged red cat
the first food he had had in days
I got in just as they both
had stepped outside
from this emergency feeding
Hmm Tuna, eh?
Taser had deliberately lied to Ron
in order to hyme extra Tuna from him
The day of Tuna Hyming was today
it started at dawn
and went well into the afternoon
Taser lied to get tuna
he rooked in my friend
and put on a fake starving animal routine
to get extra tuna..
to extend the Sunday tuna treat party deep into the heart of Monday
when i caught on
there was nothing i could do
he had already eaten the extra tuna
and was siting with us
licking his feet
as the squirrels who hate him
yelled doen from the trees above
They hate him because
he tries to kill squirrels and eat them
I bet the tuna community hate him
Everybody else though
loves him - and he loves them
If cats valued money
they would all
be bank robbers
counterfieiters
or stock market swindlers
